Often in a
long-term relationship, couples ultimately face the question of
whether or not to shack up. The prospect of living together
offers the advantages of spending more free time together,
building the level of intimacy and the sharing of financial
resources. Living together is particularly an issue for gay
couples, since there are still legal barriers for same sex
marriage in some states. However, there are several key factors
to consider before taking the plunge.
The 'Dust-Bunny' Factor
Are you and your mate as careful about where you throw your
clothes at the end of the day?....How many dishes stay in the
sink and for how long?....How about that shower curtain? It may
seem trivial, but these little things can eventually drive you
out of your love nest or even out of the relationship
altogether. If you occasionally get the hebee-jeebees in his
bathroom or kitchen, then you can't expect to feel comfortable
when living together. If you consider your man more of a
neat-nick than you could stand living with, then you either
would have to adjust your habits or accept that living together
could hurt your relationship. Consider carefully whether you and
your boyfriend can handle each others personal habits, such as
snoring before you agree to live together. Remember, you can
have a successful long-term relationship without necessarily
sharing your living space.
Can You Balance Your Collective Budgets?
This is not as much of a question of salary as it is a question
of spending habits. If your financial priorities are on
different wavelengths this can cause serious disagreements when
living together. If your mate would blow his money on his
social-scene to keep up appearances before paying the rent, he
is obviously not a good candidate to split your valuable
resources with. Also, if one partner in the relationship carries
the brunt of the financial burden, this can ultimately cause
resentment. It is inherent that when you share a living space,
you are sharing your wealth, so think with your head, as well as
your heart before making this decision. If you have similar
long-term financial goals, this can be a promising sign. Decide
whether you and your significant other are in agreement with
your financial priorities before taking the financial risk of
living together.
Test The Waters With a Romantic Get-Away
Another key factor is how much time you currently spend
together. If you already spend the majority of your free time
together, you may find it overwhelming to spend every night
together, as well. If you both have individually busy social
lives, it may help to live together so that you can spend time
together while still making time for other friends and
activities. If you haven't already done so, you may want to take
a trip together to test the emotional waters. Spending an
extended period of time together can test your patience with
each other. If by then of the end of the trip, you don't throw
your lover overboard, you're on the right path.
There's no quick and easy way to know if moving in together is
right for your relationship. Take your time in making this
decision and don't ever let yourself feel pressured. Many
financially strained people find themselves rushing into living
with their partner to cut down on living expenses. In these
difficult times, it can be tempting to fall into this trap. If
you're in a financial rut, remember it is ultimately up to you
to clean up your own financial house. Think carefully about the
progression of the relationship, as well as your personal growth
before taking the plunge.
10 More Things To Consider Before
Living Together
Gay Marriage & Commitment
Ceremony Planner - Gay Weddings
Related
Links
